I Like Crescendos - Thoughts on Managing Based on Vibe

I was walking a 10K yesterday and relied on my iPod to keep my going at a good pace. I have several play lists set up for exercising with peppier songs. I noticed, however, that when I was hurting or needing more uumph (it was hot and humid) that I skipped the perfectly fine peppy songs in favor of songs with big drama and fuller sound.

I like crescendos. In fact, I like crescendos in all aspects of life and work.

I would be happy doing most any type of work as long as it offered the opportunity to create some boom, some wow, some big moments.

This is the vibe I prefer in all aspects of my life and those managing me can get my best work by ensuring I have the chance to experience crescendos.

We all have a preferred vibe and it is a unique thing. Management books suggest that managers ought to get to know each employee's goals and talents. And this is important to know. But I also think we should learn the vibe that fuels their engagement.

Start by thinking about the vibe that you prefer. Then share this with your team and ask them to share theirs. Examples will help clarify what you are asking.

Think about why people leave their jobs (bad manager, I know, but there is always more to it). Often it just does not fuel them. They leave a perfectly great job for an unknown but great sounding job that they hope will feel different to them. What if you could help their current job feel better?

Post written by http://www.managementcraft.com

The 7 Failures That Will Make You a Better Leader

“Success Covers a Multitude of Blunders”.

That was a famous quote from George Bernard Shaw, and it has always stuck with me throughout my career as a leader and executive.

What it ultimately told me was yes, I was going to fail – multiple times. But if I was truly determined to overcome, or “cover” them, I absolutely needed to learn from every failure, and leverage that accumulated learning into success.

In so many ways, I’ve grown to appreciate my failures – as counterintuitive as that may seem.    Because I now know if I just let them go, without reflection, then they were doomed to be repeated.

There are 7 failures that I believe bring the best improvement opportunities:

• Failure to Prioritize – Many a bad decision has come from our lack of perspective on the importance of one thing over another. The key learning here is to fully grasp the concept of “opportunity cost” – the cost of NOT doing something in favor of something else.
• Failure to Decide – If the buck is going to stop with us, then we need the courage to make timely decisions, regardless of consensus or the lack of 100% of the information needed to make them.  We learn that more often than not, it’s better to “do something” then let fear and inertia overtake us.
• Failure to Progress – When a target is reached, the bar must be raised. And when that target is hit, it must be raised again. And again.  Complacency is a state that HAS to be avoided, at all costs, and the ultimate learning here is that continuous improvement is an essential focus of any enterprise.
• Failure to Praise – Great talent needs to be nurtured and retained, in a manner that goes well beyond the paychecks and bonuses.    These lessons come hard, after the loss of individuals who felt unappreciated and undervalued.  We learn that humans need to hear those simple words – “You did a great job”.
• Failure to Trust – When first taking on a leadership role, there’s always a strong “pull” to be involved in every decision, or to want to “sign off” on literally every dollar spent or contract signed.  Until we learn that trust is an essential part of great leadership, we are doomed to overwork and a huge misapplication of time and talent.
• Failure to Mediate – Every organization will have conflicts, whether it is person to person, or department to department.  Successful leaders learn that stepping into the breach to resolve them, rather than standing back or ignoring them, can avoid even bigger problems down the road, and build influence throughout an organization.
• Failure to Fire – Nobody likes to fire anybody.   It’s one of the toughest things a leader will ever do.  But when you know in your gut it’s time to cut the cord, cut it.  Don’t wait.  Your gut will usually be right.  The failures here are a lesson to the heart – it can’t get in the way of these decisions (but it certainly can come into play in the manner in which it is handled).

Remember this lesson from the baseball diamond:  You don’t have to bat 1,000% to be successful, but when you swing and miss, get out of the box, think, and then learn before you step back in and hit that home run.

Lead well!

Post written by Terry Starbucker

7 Ways to Deal With Frustrating Telesales People

Earlier today, I was listening to my sister talking on the phone to British Telecom. Now my sis is normally very controlled, very rational and VERY used to dealing with difficult people at work but TODAY she was totally frustrated! Why? Because the BT “Customer Service” employee was working from a script & wasn’t listening to a darn word Pam was saying to her.

So here are 7 Steps to help you deal with frustrating calls:

1) Stay calm:

The best way to deal with unresponsive sales people is to stay calm and professional. Don’t give them any opportunity to hang up on you.

2) Stay positive:

Even if they drive you insane, try to adopt a positive approach and mindset. This will help you to manage stress more effectively so you are not weighed down by their hostile attitude.

 3) Be patient:

Stay in control, let them get their scripted answers out of the way and then you’ll get your point across more easily.

4) Listen.

Listen to what they say BEFORE responding. As they talk, occasionally indicate that you are still listening. Once they’ve finished, politely ask if they would courteously listen to you now without interupting

5) Don't tolerate abuse.

If the employee is still obstructive and unhelpful, ask to speak to their supervisor as you’re obviously not going anywhere with this conversation

6) De-stress yourself:

Don't let it get to you. Treat it as a game that you WILL win because you’ve remained in control. You will feel good afterwards!

7) Remember, all calls are recorded so if you need to take this further up the ladder, you’ll come out as the good guy!
Speak to you soon

Barbara Naisby
Your Mind Master
http://www.IWantSomeSelfConfidence.blogspot.com 

4 Habits of World-Class Speakers

1. Practice, Practice, Practice

The best way to learn how to speak in public…is to speak in public!

Get as much stage time as you can.

The best speakers are the ones who got up on stage every time they could, made mistakes, learned from their mistakes, and then continued learning.

 2. Get Feedback

After your speech or presentation, get feedback from your audience members. Ask them for points of improvement. They will give you ideas on how to make your speech/presentation more effective.

 3. Record and Review

You can’t learn from your mistakes unless you know what your mistakes are.

I highly recommend investing in a video-camera. Buy one of the flip-cameras so that you can carry it to your presentations and record your speech.

After your presentation, review your performance: first, watch your performance with the sound turned off and analyze your body language. Are the gestures and stage movement appropriate and purposeful? Are there any repetitive and distracting gestures you could cut out?

Next, review your presentation by closing your eyes and paying careful attention to your voice. Do you have an appropriate tone, pitch, pace?

Finally, watch your presentation with both the sound and the video to see how both the visual and audio elements fit together.

As you go through this process, write down notes about what areas you can improve on next time.

 4. Learn from the Best

The most common element of the World’s Best Speakers is that they learned from the best.

If you want to be the best, you’ve got to learn from the best.

Get coaching. Read great blogs on public speaking. Read books on the art of public speaking and apply the principles you learn.

Keep speaking up, and be sure to subscribe to the blog for more tools, techniques and processes to help you become a world-class speaker.

Written by Akash

The 3 People That Stand In Your Way Of Business Success (and How To Push Them Aside)

For every person that can help you on your way to business (and personal) success, there are many more that can do just the opposite – serve as big barriers that make the task that much more challenging.

There are three people in particular that you need to be wary of, because you WILL encounter them along the way.  One you will see EVERY DAY.

How can we move these barriers aside, and reach strongly towards our dreams?

Let’s start with Person #1.

The Naysayer

“You can’t do that!”  “Are you out of your mind!”  “No way”   The Naysayer lives in a bizarro world where nothing gets done, every idea is silly or stupid, and resentment and jealousy are written on their sleeves.    I discovered the secret to marginalizing these folks about 25 years ago – at the urging of my first boss, Ieliminated the word “CAN’T” from my vocabulary.  Banished it. Cast it off.   Once that’s done, an amazing thing happens – you can’t HEAR it on the outside either.  It no longer registers – it’s just there.   So when I encounter the Naysayer now, it’s like the “wah wah wahs” you hear on a Peanuts cartoon.

Then, there’s Person #2, a less obvious (but just as dangerous) threat.

The “Frenenvy”

“Oh, that’s interesting…”   “Good luck with that.”   “Geez, I’d like to help, but…..”   The Frenenvy, not to be confused with the “Frenemy”, is someone you know pretty well who is content to let your dreams and ambition essentially “lie there”.   Not a Naysayer, but yet, a person that could “infect” you with the same inertia that they are exhibiting.    It’s one of those 7 deadly sins at work – envy.   You are going places, and talking about it. Putting it out there.  And that can make people you know pretty nervous – not about you, but about themselves.  (I know, because earlier in my life I’ve been a Frenenvy).    Envy is powerful.  So yes, they stand in your way, but in this case, these persons are your friends, so “the push aside” isn’t necessarily casting them away, or ignoring them.    It’s just that they have issues to work through, so when it comes to your dreams, they just can’t be in that particular glide path.

Which leads us to Person #3, the one you’ll deal with every day (whether you want to or not):

YOU

“I’m scared” “I’m not trusting my instinct” “What if I fail?”    That voice inside your head  -it’s dangerous.   It never forgets anything, all the way back to when you messed up in Kindergarten and got called out by the teacher in front of everybody.  All those embarrassments and insecurities, buried beneath your dreams.  That’s the YOU you need to always be aware of, and the awareness itself it what will save you.   Because your instincts ARE good, and as a dreamer, you’ve already taken some of the hardest steps.    For us, it’s “coming to terms” with our fear that will keep it at arms length.  I wrote a letter to fear that really helped me, and I would encourage you to do the same thing, as crazy as it sounds.  Trust yourself,  and all of those internal barriers will fall away.

Here’s to success!!

Written by Terry Starbucker

5 Ways To Change A Habit

Habits make up 40 percent of our daily behaviors, according to studies. And yet, because habits unfold within our basal ganglia – one of the oldest parts of the brain – they often feel nearly unconscious. So how do you change a habit? By diagnosing it’s components, and reprograming the behavior. Here’s how to do just that:

1. Identify your habit’s routine

There is a basic pattern at the core of every habit, a kind of neurological loop that has three parts: A cue, a routine and a reward.

To understand your habit, you need to identify the components of your loop. The easiest place to start is with the routine: what behavior do you want to change? (For instance, I once had a bad habit of eating a cookie from the cafeteria every afternoon.)

2. Experiment with different rewards

Rewards are powerful because they satisfying cravings. But we’re often not conscious of the cravings that drive our behaviors. To figure out which cravings are driving particular habits, it’s useful to experiment with different rewards. For instance, on the first day of my experiment to figure out what was driving my cookie habit, when I felt the urge to go to the cafeteria and buy a cookie, I instead went outside, walked around the block, and then went back to my desk without eating anything. The next day, I went to the cafeteria and bought a donut, and ate it at my desk. The next day, I bought an apple and ate it while chatting with my friends. Eventually I figure out that what I was really craving wasn’t cookies, but socialization: Whenever I went to the cafeteria, I saw my friends.

3. Isolate the cue

Every habit has a cue, and experiments have shown that almost all habitual cues fit into one of five categories:

Location

Time

Emotional State

Other People

Immediately preceding action

So, if you’re trying to figure out the cue for the ‘going to the cafeteria and buying a chocolate chip cookie’ habit, you write down five things the moment the urge hits (these are my actual notes from when I was trying to diagnose my habit):

Where are you? (sitting at my desk)

What time is it? (3:36 pm)

What’s your emotional state? (bored)

Who else is around? (no one)

What action preceded the urge? (answered an email)

After just a few days, it was pretty clear which cue was triggering my cookie habit — I felt an urge to get a snack at a certain time of day. The habit, I had figured out, was triggered between 3:00 and 4:00.

4. Have a plan

Once you’ve figured out your habit loop — you’ve identified the reward driving your behavior, the cue triggering it, and the routine itself — you can begin to shift the behavior. You can change to a better routine by planning for the cue, and choosing a behavior that delivers the reward you are craving. What you need is a plan.

A habit is a formula our brain automatically follows:

When I see CUE, I will do ROUTINE in order to get a REWARD.

So, I wrote a plan of my own:

At 3:30, every day, I will walk to a friend’s desk and talk for 10 minutes.

It didn’t work immediately. But, eventually, it got be automatic. Now, at about 3:30 everyday, I absentmindedly stand up, look around for someone to talk to, spend 10 minutes gossiping, and then go back to my desk. It occurs almost without me thinking about it. It has become a habit.

5. Look for ‘keystone habits’

But where should a would-be habit master start?

Our lives are filled with habits, and time is limited. Knowing how to improve behaviors doesn’t resolve a central question: where to begin? Is it better to create an exercise habit, or reform eating patterns? Should someone focus on procrastination? Or biting their fingernails? Or both at the same time?

The answer is to focus on ‘keystone habits.’ Some habits, say researchers, are more important than others because they have the power to start a chain reaction, shifting other patterns as they move through our lives.  Keystone habits influence how we work, eat, play, live, spend, and communicate. Keystone habits start a process that, over time, transforms everything.

Identifying keystone habits, however, is tricky. To find them, you have to know where to look. To begin, ask yourself a central question: which habits are most core to my self image? Does exercise make you think about yourself in a different – and better – way? Then exercise might be your keystone habit. Or is it how you communicate with your spouse and kids? That might be your keystone habit. Or, how you get work done?

There are dozens of potential keystone habits, and my book spends significant time explaining how to identify and change them. But, at their core, they all share something in common: keystone habits shape how we think about ourselves. And all of them can be changed, once you know how to diagnose and influence the habit loop

Written by: Charles Duhigg

18 Truths to Start Telling Yourself

This is your journey, and yours alone.  Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.

Here are 18 truths to inspire, motivate and remind you that you aren’t confined by the boundaries others impose on you.  You are in full control of your own life, starting today.

1. I can only be me. – Stop trying to be someone else’s idea of perfect.  Be your imperfectly perfect self.  Be YOU.  When they laugh at you for being different, laugh back at them for being the same.  Judy Garland once said, “Always be a first rate version of yourself instead of a second rate version of somebody else.”  Live by this statement.  There is no such thing as living in someone else’s shoes.  The only shoes you can occupy are your own.  If you aren’t being yourself, you aren’t truly living – you’re merely existing.
2. This is my life, and my dreams are worth it. – Life is a courageous journey or nothing at all.  We cannot become who we want to be by continuing to do exactly what we’ve been doing.  If you are passionate about something, pursue it, no matter what anyone else thinks.  That’s how dreams are achieved.  Be deaf when people tell you that you can’t fulfill your dreams.  The only place where your goals and dreams are impossible is inside your head.  Once you’ve dreamed of it, you’re halfway there.  So go ahead and follow through.  Let your dreams be bigger than your fears and your actions louder than your words.  Follow your heart regardless of what others tell you to do.  At the end of the day it’s you who has to live with your decisions, not them.  Read The road Less Traveled
3. Everything, good or bad, is a life lesson. – Everyone you meet, everything you encounter, etc. – they’re all part of the learning experience we call ‘life.’  Never forget to acknowledge the lesson, especially when things don’t go your way.  If you don’t get a job that you wanted or a relationship doesn’t work, it only means something better is out there waiting.  And the lesson you just learned is the first step towards it. Remember, there are no mistakes, only lessons.  Love yourself, trust your choices, remember what you deserve, and keep pushing forward.
4. A few REAL friends are all I need. – When it comes to relationships, focus on quality over quantity.  Spend your time with friends who love and appreciate you, and who encourage you to improve in healthy and exciting ways.  They are the ones who make you feel more alive, and not only embrace who you are now, but also embrace and embody who you want to be, unconditionally.  Spend more time with those who make you smile and less time with those who you feel pressured to impress. These people make your day a little bit brighter simply by being in it.  It is better to have one true friend than all the acquaintances in the world.
5. My actions and words directly affect the lives around me. – Lead by example.  Practice what you preach or don’t preach at all.  Walk the talk!  People watch what you do more than they listen to what you say.  Inspire, challenge and encourage people to their best, by doing YOUR best.  And when someone else is doing a great job, tell them that you’re proud of them.  Encourage them.  Take the time to recognize their effort.  If they know you believe they can do great things, they will often go to great lengths to live up to your expectations.  Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.  Optimism is a happiness magnet.  If you stay positive and confident, good things and good people will be drawn to you.
6. Broken promises destroy relationships. – You make commitments to others and yourself all the time.  The question is: Do you keep them?  If you said you’re going to do something, do it!  When you fail to keep a promise, it tells others that you don’t value their time or relationship.  Don’t over-promise; under-promise and over-deliver on everything you do.  And a few words to the wise:  Never make a big decision when you’re angry, and never make a big promise when you’re overjoyed.
7. The little things are often the big things. – Keep it simple.  There is absolute joy and wonder to be had in the simplest of moments – like watching the sunset over the horizon or spending time with a family member.  Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things.
8. People regret the things they did NOT do. – You miss 100% of the shots you never take.  Choices, chances and changes – start making them.  You must make a choice to take a chance, or your life will never change.  In the end, more so than the mistakes we made, we regret the chances we didn’t take, relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make.
9. Small people can make a BIG difference. – Stay positive when negativity surrounds you.  Smile when others frown.  It’s an easy way to make a difference.  There are many small, simple actions you can make to profoundly impact your family, your community, and the world.  You could pick up and throw away some trash you see on the street.  Send thoughts of loving kindness, support and peace to a friend.  Find something in your house you no longer need and give to someone who could use it.  Everyone values the gift of unexpected assistance and those who supply it.  Leave everything a little better than you found it.  You’ll see why.
10. Adversity makes us strong and wise. – Pain makes you stronger.  Tears make you braver.  Heartbreak makes you wiser.  Be grateful for your past because it helped shape who you are.  And thank the past for a better future.  Live for today, learn from yesterday, and hope for tomorrow.  Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain.
11. Everyone deserves kindness and respect. – Treat everyone with kindness and respect, even those who are rude to you – not because they are nice, but because you are.  There are no boundaries or classes that define a group of people that deserve to be respected.  Treat everyone with the same level of respect you would give to your grandfather and the same level of patience you would have with your baby brother.  People will notice your kindness.
12. Everyone has something amazing to offer. – Accept people just the way they are.  In most cases it’s impossible to change them anyway, and it’s rude to try.  If you give them a chance, everyone has something amazing to offer.  Open your mind, arms and heart to all people; we are united in our differences, and stronger together because of them.
13. There’s no point in doing something if I’m not going to do it right. – I’m impressed by great guitarists, writers, bloggers, painters, motivational speakers, internet entrepreneurs, computer engineers, mothers, fathers, athletes, etc.  And there’s only one thing they all have in common: They excel at what they do.  There’s no point in doing something if you aren’t going to do it right.  Excel at your work and excel at your hobbies.  Develop a reputation for yourself, a reputation for consistent excellence.  Read The Four Agreements.
14. Dishonesty should never be tolerated. – Nobody likes a liar.  In the long-run, the truth always reveals itself anyway.  Either you own up to your actions or your actions will ultimately own you.  Living a life of honesty creates peace of mind, and peace of mind is priceless.  Period.  Don’t be dishonest and don’t put up with people who are.
15. Personal growth will feel uncomfortable at first. – Growth always begins at the end of your comfort zone.  So break out of your comfort zone and try something new.  Fight the unfamiliar and enjoy the experience.  Try out that new restaurant.  Stop by the new park.  Routines stagnate us.  New experiences help us grow and they make life interesting.  Make an effort to try something new every day this week.  It can be a whole new activity or just a small experience, such as talking to a stranger.  Once you get the ball rolling, many of these new experiences will open doors to life changing opportunities.  And with a strategy of continuous small steps into new experiences, we are able to sidestep the biggest barrier to positive change:  Fear.
16. Happiness is a choice that comes from within. – Being happy doesn’t mean everything is perfect, it means you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.  There are choices you can make every day to feel the effects of happiness.  Choose to be around the right people.  Choose to focus on what you have, not on what you haven’t.  Choose a good attitude.  Choose to express gratitude.  Choose to forgive.  Choose to take care of your body.  Begin today by taking responsibility for your own happiness.  The choice is yours.  Read Stumbling On Happiness.
17. The more I invest in myself, the more control I will have over my life. – Invest time and energy in yourself every day.  When you invest in yourself, you can never lose, and over time you will change the trajectory of your life.  You are simply the product of what you know.  The more time and energy you spend acquiring pertinent knowledge, the more control you have over your life.
18. Knowledge without action accomplishes nothing. – The number one thing I persistently see holding smart people back is their own reluctance to take action with the knowledge they already have.  In other words, they believe they require additional knowledge, skill, experience, etc. before they can aptly partake in an opportunity.  Yes, more knowledge is great to have, but without action it doesn’t get you anywhere.  You’ve got to take baby steps.  You’ve got to act on what you know.  Remember, the acquisition of knowledge doesn’t mean you’re growing; growing happens when what you know changes how you live.

Post written by Angel